Improving Relationships

If you want to improve your relationships, you will have to implement three basic steps which are given below

•	You should not keep on trying to change others but yourself. We usually try to blame the other person for a sour relationship and expect him or her to change according to our needs. But instead of doing this, we should tell ourselves and the other person that in order to make a relationship work, both have to try to change themselves, not others. However, sometimes it might be possible that the other person needs to change his or her attitude but we do not have the right to impose this. It is the other person’s free will to change and we can simply adjust to them. However, the choice of changing yourself lies with you. Changing yourself in such a situation always proves to be difficult but not impossible.
•	Whatever changes you might be bringing in yourself, do not expect to see them in a short time. Changes usually take a longer time than expected because most of these have become habits since long and you resist changing them involuntarily. One needs perseverance and persistence to change such habits to improve the relationship.
•	You should not expect the other person in the relationship to behave in the way that pleases you. Accept people for what they are and not what you wish them to be. In any relationship, the other people will definitely say or do things that could annoy you or make you feel uncomfortable, and more often than not, you expect that persons to change the way they conduct themselves. But this is completely unfair in any relationship. You need to stop thinking like that and realize that you became a part of the relationship with this person because of who he or she really is. To change them according to your convenience would contradict the basic essence of the relationship. Always remember one thing, there are no ‘Ifs in relationships’. When you start changing yourself, you will soon realize that the other person has also starting to change.

However, these steps are not guaranteed to bring life back into your relationship. It may be very much possible that once you have changed yourself, the other person is still not willing to change and you still wish that he or she would try to adjust with you. In case this situation arises, then it is best if you simply end the relationship and move on.